The End

ACC has been over for almost two weeks, and I still get pangs of nostalgia. I didn't think I would miss ACC, Beijing, and China so much. I thought I would be happy to leave the pollution, subtle (and some not so subtle) discrimination, and msg saturated food behind, and come back to blue skies, diversity, acceptance, and Caesar salads. Instead, I find myself missing Beijing's festive atmosphere, my friends and teachers from ACC, and surprisingly, even the hordes of people everywhere, something that I found so suffocating while I was in China. The pace at which life moves in Beijing and Arizona is so different - when I was studying at ACC, I missed Arizona's tranquility, and coming back, I find myself sorely missing Beijing's energy.

Thank you again Light Fellowship for giving me this amazing opportunity. I've grown so much this summer through this experience. Besides getting a chance to see Nu Jiang and what I've been researching all last semester with my own eyes, and being able to dedicate all of my energy for an entire summer to learning Chinese, I feel like I've found a second home. One that is sometimes a little unnerving in its attitudes and a lot intimidating in its expectations of me as an Asian American, but one that is exciting in its hustle and bustle, and filled with great memories I'll cherish for a lifetime.

A Couple More Weeks, A Couple More Stories

Tired of scraping together meals from FaBao, the nearby grocery store, Rachel and I decided to eat dinner at WanFuJing's xiao3chi1 market.

Rachel had a special delicacy in mind, and so we walked...

and walked...
...until lo and behold, a whole rack of them appeared before our eyes!
Can you guess what they are?

Scorpions!
mmm yummy...
We decided to wash them down with some coconut - quite the meal.

A few days later, I spent a day with my father's old high school friend's son, and we visited Peking University and Tsinghua University. The first thing that I noticed about the two campuses, were that there were hordes of people everywhere! I used to think that Yale got a lots of tours groups, but after seeing Peking and Tsinghua, the influx of tourists at Yale seems like a mere trickle.


People were crowding around and fighting to be the fastest person to jump up there next to the stone to get their picture taken. It literally took us about ten minutes to get this picture (an even greater shame that my eyes are closed).





A group of us ACC students decided to go searching for the best roasted duck in town (ergo the best duck place in China since Beijing is the most famous for this specialty), and locals directed us to LiQun Roasted Duck. Al Gore and Clinton are among some famous people to have eaten at this place (pictorial proof was plastered all over the walls), and at the table next to us, a Taiwanese how-to show was filming a segment.

ACC paired us with a language partner, usually a grad student from our host university, or another university in Beijing. I didn't have that many opportunities to meet with mine, because she attended school on the west side of Beijing, while ACC was located on the east side. Here are some pictures when I finally did get a chance to meet with her and see her school.

See the really tall swing in the background? I finally convinced my language partner to try it
A typical Chinese student's dorm room (we were definitely lucky at ACC with our two to one room and in suite bathroom)
For ACC's "Explore Beijing" Day, I visited Friends of Nature, China's first NGO. Their offices were much smaller than I expected (only three rooms, instead of an actual building), and they seemed pretty low on funds. Despite the lack of funding, some of their projects were pretty impressive. They mainly concentrate on education - teaching children about protecting the environment so that when they grow up, it will be a concept that is second nature to them - and holding conferences to raise attention on certain environmental problems.

Below is a game that they play with elementary school children to teach them about nature and environmental protection.
Ms. Yan and I (I interviewed her about Friends of Nature's history, current projects, involvement with Nu Jiang's dam controvery, etc)
Dining in Beijing means getting a lot of good food for very little money, but after two months of feasting on restaurant dishes, I started craving sandwiches, salads, pasta, and cheese (just to name a "few"). A friend and I decided to make our own version of pizza...and we were too impatient, and so we just wolfed down the bread, tomato sauce, and pepper jack cheese. It was glorious. It will go down in history as "American Night."

What "American Night" is complete with Friends?
We were happy, oh yes, we were.

A Future in China?

Before this experience, I was 75% sure that I wanted to work in China after I graduated, although if you had asked me what company? or what kind of job? I wouldn't have been able to give you a very clear answer. I was expecting that this percentage would go up after studying in China and gaining a better understanding of this country's culture and history, but actually, my inclination for working in China has gone down. (Of course, this may be because I'm going through the predicted low point that according to the chart we saw during orientation hits right at around two or three months, and in that case, I'll probably change my mind in the upcoming couple of weeks.)

These days, I'm discovering more and more small things in the culture and the environment that disproportionately upset me. For example, I was really offended after a verbal exchange with some street vendors in Datong. A group of us ACC students were buying ice cream, and the sight of so many foreigners drew a crowd. After huddling around, one street vendor asked us where we were from. They had spotted me and a couple of other Asian American students, and when we all replied, "America" they started laughing and were like "there's no way! Just look at those two! They're clearly Chinese." That in itself didn't really bother me (although through this exchange we can see that most Chinese people haven't grasped the concept that America is this huge melting pot that contains people from all different countries), because I do consider myself Chinese - not only are my parents Chinese, but I was born in China. What happened next, however, really upset me. After buying our ice cream we started heading for the bus, but we hadn't gone a few steps before one of them yelled at me and the other Asian American student: "喂! 把你的客人带过来! 叫他们买点儿有大同特色的东西吧!" [Bring your guests over here to buy some souvenirs] Just a couple of minutes ago we had explained to them that we were all American students studying Chinese in Beijing, and so they knew full well that the other students were not part of some tour group, and that I was not their tour guide. When I told them again that I was also a student, they responded with: "你皮肤那样黄, 算什么美国人呀!" [With your skin color, how can you call yourself an American?"

As I'm starting to realize that this attitude is one held by many Chinese people, I'm starting to reconsider how much I actually want to work here after I graduate - do I really want colleagues who think the supposed discrepancy between the culture I identity with and my appearance is some kind of identity mistake on my part, and not the essence of who I am? On one hand I feel a little guilty for not accepting this point of view as just part of Chinese culture (that's what an integration-inclined me would do), but at the same time, how can I not help but feel like an outsider of two worlds? Thus, why should I work in China, and subject myself to this feeling of alienation?

Before and After the Midterm Hurtle

Midterms:
The general stress level during midterm week was really high...to the point that I think our attitude hurt some of our teachers' feelings - after one 大班课 the teacher pulled a couple of us aside and was like: "Did I do something wrong? Why was everyone glaring at me today?"

As much as I love ACC, there are definitely some flaws, especially in organization; the teachers often make alterations to our assignments, and notify us the evening before it's due. We also get our exam review packets the night before the test, leaving us very little time to prepare, especially since besides the review, Level 4 students have a take home four-essay portion that often takes me a good five hours. These organization problems were extremely apparent during midterm week, when the slightest change without adequate notification caused us a lot of stress. I think one reason for the confusion was that we would misinterpret the written instructions they provided in advance, and when the teachers finally verbally went over with us what we were supposed to do, we would realize that we were missing a large chunk of the it! The result would be general panic and a mad scramble to tie up these loose ends the night before the assignment was due. So, a tip for next year ACC students: carefully read the instructions, go over anything that in unclear with the teachers, and get a head start on the work! Otherwise you'll end up like me with my powerpoint, speech, preparation for 5 oral exam questions, and exam review to finish at 2am the morning of the test. Not good!

Datong:
We left via night train to Datong that night after taking our midterm. Overall the trip was pretty fun (a religious studies major would probably describe it as euphoric), but the timing of it could not have been worse! I don't understand how ACC could have expected us to truly enjoy Datong when most of us were so sleep-deprived! Exhaustion from midterms combined with the night train experience, and followed by "say 'qiezi", ::snap::, come on let's get moving to the next spot so we can take a quick picture where we're all awkwardly making peace signs" kind of tourism resulted in the majority of us getting sick by the end of the trip. I really wish ACC had given us one day to relax before taking us on the trip, or at the very least, more than just the one day when we got back (when I say one day when we got back, what I mean is we got back at 5 am Sunday morning, took a nap, and then had to start our homework, studying, and essay for the next day).

Great Wall and Datong Pics:

"不到长城非好汉" - flexing our "muscles" after climbing to the top of the Great Wall
being stereotypically Chinese...
it got pretty steep at some spots...
taking a breather
on the night train to Datong (city in Shanxi Province)
Hanging Monetary in Datong
Apparently next year tourists won't be allowed to climb up to the Monetary, so we were really lucky to get a chance to see this


Wooden Pagoda (no nails were used in the construction of this monster of a building!)
Chinese people seriously love this sign...they've even got it wearing pants!
Yungang Caves
These statues were carved by digging a hole in a mountain and hollowing it out, a process that took over 60 years to complete. There were a total of twelve caves, and most of the caves were completely covered with carvings (including Buddhas statues as small as 2 inches)

Nine Dragon Screen (built over 600 years ago, it's the oldest and largest glazed screen in China)
We wanted to play poker and so we got animal crackers to serve as chips... unfortunately, we soon found that not only were we too tired to play, but the crackers tasted more like cardboard than something edible... We ended up feeding some to the fish in the moat at Nine Dragon Screen and uh, gave the rest to a cute little boy on the streets....

Enjoying Datong's night life, aka eating lots of "stinky tofu" and getting tattoos!
*we walk into the hotel front lobby where three of our teachers are chatting*
Me: Zhang Lao Shi, we're in a bit of pain
Zhang Lao Shi: What's wrong? Diarrhea? There's a bathroom on the second floor.
Me: No...our skin feels weird. Is it supposed to hurt?
Zhang Lao Shi: What do you mean...what's supposed to hurt?
Me: Our arms....
Rachel: Zhang Lao Shi, we got tattoos!
Julia (quietly): They made me do it!
Me (in a carrying whisper): Is it true that usually the needles in China aren't sanitary?
Zhang Lao Shi: AHHHH OH MY GOD!!!!!! *starts to scrub frantically at our arms* pause AHHHHHHHH it won't come off!!!
hahahaha

no, they're not real. although i hope it comes off soon. i get weird looks in the streets because i'm a five foot tall girl sporting a skull

ACC's Best Feature - 50:39
So far, the best thing about ACC have been the teachers; there are fifty of us and thirty-nine of them --talk about an abundance of resources! We have three teachers that rotate for our 大班课，five for our 小班课，and then all of the fourth year teachers for our 对话课 and 单班课。I really like this system; I get a chance to meet all of the teachers, and then seek out the ones that I have particularly interesting discussions with after class and get to know them better. What really impresses me about these teachers is how enthusiastic and dedicated they are. In the morning, most of us stumble, half-asleep into the classroom. It truly takes an extraordinarily patient and energetic teacher to rouse us from our stupor and refrain from wanting to murder us in the process. I was especially impressed when I asked one of my 大班课 teachers, 韩老师，a question that she didn't know that answer to, and a few hours later, I received a long typed out explanation taped to my door. Also, before ACC, I had this stereotype that Chinese people weren't all that funny, or at least, their sense of humor lay on a completely different plane than ours. I've been pleasantly surprised by a number of ACC teachers who are both hilariously sarcastic and quite skilled at teasing students (friendly banter, of course).
On another note, I'm really grateful that I'm experiencing ACC and Beijing when I'm at the stage where everyday conversation is not a problem and with some effort, I can hold my own in debates with more complex ideas. I may sound like a fourth grader, but at least with a fourth grader's vocabulary, I can describe everything I want to express in a roundabout way and then learn the formal, condensed version of what I just described. With a foundation, improvement comes quickly, and with a lot less frustration -- I feel like I'm close to getting to where I want to be when it comes to Chinese!

What's Got Me Thinking - 对话课
Recently, the highlight of my day has been my 对话课, an hour long class where we debate with another student, with a teacher as a moderator (except, often the teacher gets really excited and becomes a third party, usually representing the Chinese point of view). There have been so many topics that have forced me to think about why Chinese and Americans think the way they do, and the reasons for these differences in viewpoint. [to be continued soon - my homework is beckoning]

A Week In Pictures
Last Friday, ACC assigned us our Chinese families. When 张老师 introduced us to the family, she mistakenly told us that the girl and the boy standing next to our Chinese 爸爸 and 妈妈 were twins. Later, when we were getting to know each other, I asked the two of them that since they were twins, if they were alike in personality. They both got this surprised and somewhat offended look on their faces, and the girl asked me if I thought they looked alike. Confused, I was like, "I guess not, but you could be fraternal twins" (except I didn't know the Chinese word for "fraternal," and so I stumbled around trying to describe the concept for a couple of minutes). I guess I wasn't very successful in explaining what I thought they were, and so when ten minutes later when the girl was like "we met freshman year of college," for a second, I thought I had before me one of those classic separated-at-birth-and-then-reunited twin stories. It took me a second to realize real life is NOT like a Mary Kate and Ashley movie, and that the two of them were boyfriend and girlfriend. Talk about miscommunication! Both my ACC sister and I were really embarrassed, and this story is definitely going to be a standing joke between us and our Chinese family. (Our only defense is that the teacher was wrong too - ha!)
Above - my Chinese family took us to the "countryside" for lunch last week (I put countryside in quotes, because as the city expanded, Beijing's countryside got swallowed up by the city, and now the place we visited is somewhere where people come to vacation and experience a peasant's lifestyle - minus the poverty, the cold, and other hardships). The family that owned the (what I would call) simulation countryside had this adorable puppy.

Above - My ACC sister (we share a Chinese family). We sitting in one of “炕" (the stove is located underneath the 炕, and so in the winter they both eat and sleep on this raised surface)

Above - from left to right: wife of "Simulation Countryside" owner, owner, Chinese 爸爸，Chinese 妈妈。Not pictured: Chinese 姐姐，and her boyfriend
The owner's son is currently studying abroad in Singapore, and he kept trying to set us with him! He kept inquiring whether we had boyfriends back home, and telling us that not only was his son tall, but he was very "white" (pale).

Above - The food was SO good! Most of the vegetables were grown in the surrounding fields... and would you take a look at that mountain of mashed potato! It felt like home.

Above - After lunch with my Chinese family, I went to Xiu Shui Jie and met up with a friend from HBA. There was so much stuff, 我们的眼睛都看花了! The picture was taken on the fourth floor, aka a girl's heaven.

Roommate Love (aka Weekday Night Life)

My roommate An KeShan (Kirsten Atkinson) - I'm so glad I got placed with her! She's also a four year student, and since misery loves company, our sleepless nights are much more bearable. She was also a spring term student, and so she's a great resource for good places to eat and fun things to do in Beijing.

The splattered mosquito remains on the walls were starting to bother us, and so we decorated the room. ACC also provided us with a useful safe for our passport and money. The only problem is someone could easily roll that tiny thing right out of the room...

This is what we morph into at two in the morning....

...this is what we look like when we crawl out of bed...

...and this is what we look like when we pass out from exhaustion.

Why Do I Like to Torture Myself?
I've taken on a new assignment. In the fall, ACC students take four credits worth of classes: two for regular Chinese class, one for Ancient Text, and one for a 3,000 word thesis on a topic of their choice. I thought that the 3,000 word paper was also a summer assignment, and got really excited to discuss Beijing's environmental issues with the ACC teachers, and then go out and interview the organizers of certain NGOs. Now, instead of completing all four of the essays ACC assigns us for the summer, I'm going to replace one of them with the fall thesis. As of now, I"m really excited about this assignment, but I'll probably have second thoughts when I actually start cranking out this monster. At least I can look back on this entry, and maybe my current optimism will inspire me at whatever ridiculous hour it is in the morning to keep chugging!